arbitrary constant

The following are the opening gambits of three conversations I have recently been involved in whilst sitting on the London Underground.

Those are nice. Did your grandmother knit them?

Is the Lord Jesus in your life?

F*ck off, you pr*ck.

Strictly speaking, the last one was more of an argument and was the response to my request for someone to stop pushing me whilst we both waited on a very crowded platform. Arguments are a very particular type of conversation, though, so I feel comfortable including that line above — even if I wasn't comfortable on the platform.

Filed in Personal